Subject: Self-introduction email
Dear Professor Blackstone,
My name is Valencia Tan and I am
currently a year 1 student studying sustainable infrastructure engineering (SIE)
in the Singapore Institute of Technology (SIT). Unlike the majority of my schoolmates, I
do not have an engineering background. Instead, I was learning about hotel and
leisure facilities management in Singapore Polytechnic in the early stages of
my tertiary education.
Many asked what made me pursue a
different course in life, which is a question I frequently ask myself too. I believe that interest sparked during the
last semester of the polytechnic, where I had to take a module about building services.
It made me understood how facilities management played a key role in fuelling a
user’s experience and it is not only about the frontline services.
My daily life is heavily
influenced by the arts as I enjoy painting in my free time as well as a little bit
of photography—nothing too serious, just a snap here and there. Photography
played a part in my decision to further develop a deeper understanding of building
infrastructures as well. I am unknowingly drawn to taking pictures of buildings
and infrastructures rather than portraits, as seen from most of the photos that
make up my album.
One of my greatest strengths is
that I am adaptive in my style of communication. I can read the settings well
and change accordingly. This means that I participate and listen attentively
when needed. For example, I actively participate in group discussions and class activities. One weakness is that I am
not able to articulate my thoughts as well as how I want it to be. I often find it difficult to replace my
thoughts with the right words and convey it through speaking or writing, which
is what I would like to improve on under your guidance. Another goal is to not
lose touch with my language and creative skills as there will be lesser leisure time when school starts to pick up its pace.
I am sure that I would enjoy the
rest of the module just as how I am enjoying myself so far. I am looking
forward to learning more from you too!
Warmest regards,
Tan Jing Wen Valencia
Revised: 30 October 2020
Hi Valencia,
ReplyDeleteYou have a good content and organisation. But maybe you could give a short scenario on how your strength has helped you. Thank you.
Hi Izzati!
DeleteThank you for your feedback. I will elaborate more on how my strength has helped me.
Cheers,
Valencia Tan
Hello Valencia,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing about yourself and I got to know you better through this letter! It was a pleasure reading the letter, and it is a really interesting read.
In terms of content, it is really interesting and well elaborated, especially about the part on "Why you chose SIE". However, I find that the goals and weaknesses can be elaborated more , but other than that, the content is really good!
In terms of organization, I feel that you have done a great job in displaying the 7Cs of communication. It is very complete and concise, and I enjoyed the flow of the writing.
Lastly, about the language use, I do not see any obvious errors in terms of language use, and I feel that you did well in it!
Hope to interact with you more in the coming classes, and I hope my comments are helpful to you!
Cheers,
JY
Dear Valencia,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this clear and concise introductory letter of yourself!
The letter is generally well elaborated and I like how your hobby, photography, has deepen your understanding in building infrastructures which is the main learning outcome of our course! This left a great impression of your letter :D
In terms of organization, the flow is good and for language use, I thought that "most of the photos that made up my album" would be grammatically correct instead of "most of the photos that make up my album". It would be nice if you could further elaborate on your goals as well! :)
Best wishes,
Zann
Dear Valencia,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing about yourself through this letter. It allowed me to get to know you a lot more.
The content of this letter is adequate as it covers all the required points, and were elaborated with examples as well.
The letter is also well organised as it is structured well and the flow of it was great, especially the part where you talked about your weakness and then transitioning to talk about your goal based on the weakness.
Language use for this letter is good, however there are several issues present. In the sentence "It made me understood how facilities management played a key role in fuelling a user’s experience and it is not only about the frontline services", I believe that the word 'understood' should be changed to 'understand'. 'Played' should be 'plays' as it is something still ongoing.
Overall, this was a great letter and I enjoyed reading it. I am looking forward to get to know you more in the coming weeks ahead.
Regards,
Joel
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteDear Valencia,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this clear, highly informative letter. I appreciate the way you've taken us readers beyond the pleasantries of ticking the assignment brief boxes and that you have also given us a deeper understanding of what you value. I find it particularly interesting that you see this module as means of keeping touch with your 'language and creative skills.' :)
Like your other readers, I too enjoy learning about your hobbies. (We should nominate you to be the class photographer!)
In terms of language use, this is a fine letter. There is, however, one word choice that illustrates what you mean when you state that you need to refine your ability to make the right word choice: technicalities. Look that up in the dictionary.
I look forward to working with you and learning more about you this term.
Best wishes,
Brad